Proverbial Philosophy

                           I.
There once was a dog in the manger
Who snarled at both neighbor & stranger
     Though he drove cows away he wouldn’t eat hay
That malevolent dog in the manager.

                           II.
There was an old cat in a garret
Where all was too foreign to bear it.
     As you well might have guessed, She looked very distressed,
That alienate cat in a garret.

                           III.
A fiend sallied out pirouetting,
Where a worthy old hen had been “sething”
     “Every chick for himself
     Said the impudent elf”
That saltatant fiend pirouetting.

                           IV.
You have heard of the solemn New Yorker
Who’d a fancy for cheering a porker
     “Great cry, little wool!”
     He said sorrowful,
That ubiquitous solemn New Yorker.

                           V.
In a meadow, wherever it may be
I chanced on a Bumblebee baby
     ‘Twas biggest in girth
     On the day of its birth
That didactical Bumble-bee’s baby.

                           VI.
There once was a sprout of Iniquity
Who courted a Miss of antiquity;
     “She’ll do to begin on,”
     He said with a grin on
That inchoate spring of iniquity.

                           VII.
The Jug is an arrogant Vandal
All over one side is the handle,
     A wicked production
     Of Clay and destruction
That aluminate compromise vandal.

                           VIII.
Old puss on her bed in the ashes
Singed whiskers & fur & eyelashes
     In worth she is greater
     Than looks indicate her,
That ustulate cat in the ashes.

                           IX.
A matronly cow osculator
While kissing her bovine lactator,
     Exclaimed without haste
     “Every one to his taste!”
That egregious bovine osculator